Enjoy.
As the Magnolias Blossom
We had a second chance at life but you left again and the touch I long for is absent.
Like your boots from the doorway
and your blue-striped toothbrush from the sink.
I have trouble finding your scent on the pillow and my hand grasps air when I forget and wear my comfy socks after mopping the kitchen and slip like I klutzily do every time.
Tell me you are smiling at that.
This is what I imagine will happen:
You see, you called me days ago and mentioned the rumor flying around base of another deployment. I cannot handle these rumors.
You tell me they are just that but I worry. A rumor on your terms is different then what I hear in my coffee shop girl talk. I think Jane is cheating on her husband but you possibly going to war makes me want to hold on to you for dear life. I cannot sip a Coconut Mocha over that and not pay attention. I could never find myself in another man’s arms.
What happens to you affects me. I know your rumors.
I do not want to lose my soul again.
One year was hard, but we persisted and we found every chance we could to make love through our words.
I am afraid I do not have enough words left. You took them when you separated our souls last time and I know you will need more. Without my words you have nothing and I cannot send you away without me.
One year together cannot make up for one year lost. I simply will not give up this second chance.
Yet,
when you whisper to me of the rumor, of the phone call in which you said ‘no, not this time’ I hear in your voice the command of your men. They cannot go without you and I will breathe in one last time and wait for the smell of flowers as you call them back and give them your heart.
The Magnolia trees will bloom and I will collect the petals as they fall counting down every day you are gone, for when the tree dies come winter,
I know you will disappear without one goodbye so as to make it easier.
The letters will come and I will wait until the Magnolia trees bloom again.
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